February 11th, 2009

A diary from Upstate NY - I miss it up there!

 Living in Upstate  New York
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Aug. 12 - Moved into our new home in New  York . It is so beautiful here. The hills and river valleys are so  picturesque. I have a beautiful old oak tree in my front yard. Can  hardly wait to see the change in the seasons. This is truly God’s  Country.

Oct. 14 - New York is such a gorgeous  place to live, one of the real special places on Earth. The leaves are turning a multitude of different colors.. I love all of the shades of  reds, oranges and yellows, they are so bright.. I want to walk through  all of the beautiful hills and spot some white tail deer. They are so graceful, certainly they must be the most peaceful creatures on Earth. This must be paradise.

Nov. 1 - It snowed today.  The first snow of the year.  The air is so crisp, clean and  refreshing. This is great!
 
Nov. 11 - Deer season  opens this week. I can’t imagine why anyone would want to shoot these elegant animals. They are the very symbol of peace and tranquility here  in New York . I hope it snows again soon. I love it here!

Dec.  2 - It snowed again last night.. I woke to the usual wonderful sight: everything covered in a beautiful blanket of white. The oak tree is magnificent. It looks like a postcard. We went out and swept the snow from the steps and driveway.. We had a snowball fight. I won, and the snowplow came down  the street. He must have gotten too close to the driveway because we had  to go out and shovel the end of the driveway again. What a beautiful  place. Nature in harmony. I love it here!

Dec..  12 - More snow last night. I love it! The plow did his cute  little trick again. What a rascal. A winter wonderland. I love it here! 

Dec. 19 - More snow - couldn’t get out of the driveway to get to work in time. I’m exhausted from all of the  shoveling. And that snowplow!
 
Dec. 21 - More of  that white shit coming down. I’ve got blisters on my hands and a kink in  my back. I think that the snowplow driver waits around the corner until  I’m done shoveling the driveway. Asshole.
 
Dec.  25 - White Christmas? More freakin’ snow. If I ever get my hands  on the sonofabitch who drives that snowplow, I swear I’ll castrate him.  And why don’t they use more salt on these roads to melt this crap?? 
 
Dec. 28 - It hasn’t stopped snowing since Christmas. I have been inside since then, except of course when that SOB  “Snowplow Harry” comes by. Can’t go anywhere, cars are buried up to the  windows. Weather man says to expect another 10 inches. Do you have any  idea how many shovelfuls 10 inches is??
 
Jan. 1 - Happy New Year? The way it’s coming down it won’t melt until the 4th of July! The snowplow got stuck down the road and the shithead actually  had the balls to come and ask to borrow a shovel! I told him I’d broken six already this season.
 
Jan. 4 - Finally  got out of the house.. We went to the store to get some food and a  goddamn deer ran out in front of my car and I hit the bastard. It did $3,000 in damage to the car. Those beasts ought to be killed. The  hunters should have a longer season if you ask me.
 
Feb. 28 - Just paid my heating bill for the past month.  It was almost as much as my mortgage payment: $600 for my 2-bedroom home
 
Mar.  27 - Warmed up a little and rained today. The rain turned the snow into ice and the weight of it broke the main limb of the oak tree  in the front yard and it went through the roof. I should have cut that old piece of shit into fireplace wood when I had the chance. 
 
Apr. 18 - The snow is finally starting to disappear.  I think I saw a blade of grass today!  First time since October!
 
May 10 - Took my car to the local garage. Would  you believe the whole underside of the car is rusted away from all of  that damn salt they dump on the road? Car looks like a bashed up, heap  of rusted cow shit.  Plus the piles of snow collected by the snow plows still have not melted.  Now they look like big piles of elephant shit.
 
May 23 - Sold the car, the  house, and moved to Florida . I can’t imagine why anyone in their  freakin’ mind would ever want to live in the God forsaken State of New York

-Thanks BigJer